Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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