Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
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Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
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who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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