Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
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The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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