that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
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If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
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