yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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