can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize