either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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