Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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