goodnight i made you a song goodbye
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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