my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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