Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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