Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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