Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize