There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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