im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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