i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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