ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Randomize