i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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