im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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