We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
this will be a night to untag.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
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