I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
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Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
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Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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