I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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