ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
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I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
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5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Randomize