It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize