You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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