we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize