They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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