i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
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