hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
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