Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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