Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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