Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
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OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
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