You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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