You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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