I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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