Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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