Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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