another moral hangover. fuck.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
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Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
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Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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