Banned from zoo.
Again?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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