First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize