i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize