Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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