All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Please, let me fuck your mom
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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