i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
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I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
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I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
We had sex on a dog bed..
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
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