My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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