his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize