Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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