how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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