Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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