Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
As shirtless as possible
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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